Column for March 1, 2005
Morris J. Amitay
With all the troubles of the world today it is often difficult to maintain even a wry sense of humor. Pick up a newspaper and you can find some of the most outlandish statements that are actually taken seriously. Some of these can either make you laugh or cry, but the joke is often on the reporters who accept them at face value. The Middle East is a special place for generating the truly absurd
We all remember the lesson taught by the story of little George Washington and his father’s favorite cherry tree – “never tell a lie”. But the Arab equivalent must have Mohammed swearing to his father that it was the Jews who cut down dad’s beloved palm tree – while little Mohammed is still holding the ax behind his back. In the Arab world it is accepted as common knowledge that the Jews conspired with the Nazis, perpetrated the 9/11 attacks on the twin towers, routinely use blood to bake matzos, and most recently, assassinated former Lebanese Prime Minister Hariri. Given this mindset, why is it so strange that the current diplomatic euphoria over Mahmoud Abbas shouldn’t remind us of the movie “Groundhog Day” – as the same scene repeats itself over and over again. Why is it that the mass prisoner releases by Israel in exchange for Palestinian promises to crack down on terrorists looks like déjà vu all over again? Or, to put it another way, why should Charlie Brown believe that this time Lucy won’t yank that football away again?
The latest suicide bombing in Tel-Aviv was “condemned” by Abbas, but if you look carefully at what disturbed him – actually, it was not the killing and maiming of innocent Israelis. Instead, he blamed “saboteurs” for “destroying the aspirations of our people”. And we should all know by now what these “aspirations” are, considering that even after his election Abbas referred to Israel as the “Zionist enemy”. Once again, we have witnessed hundreds of convicted terrorists being released in order to bolster a Palestinian leader’s “credibility” with his followers. The Washington Post heralded the tearful homecomings with a headline – “Let Freedom Ring”. It’s funny that the Post never asked why these men were being hailed as “heroes” if Abbas was serious about finally moving his people toward real peace. According to an analysis of the result of a previous mass prisoner release – some 48% of the group were up to their old tricks, thus giving new meaning to a revolving door.
The newly anointed Palestinian leadership has made it abundantly clear that when it comes to preventing attacks against Jews, it is pacifist. The rules of engagement for Palestinian police confronting Hamas and Islamic Jihad terrorists is to holster your weapons and use gentle persuasion. As one Palestinian policeman told the AP – “I will never raise my weapons against the fighters. I can only ask them not to fire”. Pretty please. In a recent incident, three terrorists were caught red handed, released in five hours, and probably given lollipops. So much for the Roadmap’s call for “dismantling the terrorist infrastructure”!
Given the selective amnesia of the mainstream media, it comes as no surprise there was little written about Abbas’ approval of the execution order for three Palestinians accused of collaborating with the enemy, Israel. The Palestinian motto seems to be “judge us on what we say, not on what we do”. And the joke is on those here and in Israel who still let them get away with it.
The role the United Nations plays in the Middle East (and the rest of the world for that matter) also merits a few chuckles. Revelations about the UN’s corrupt oil for food program is only one episode among many that leads to the conclusion that with a few exceptions, the UN’s activities over the years have evolved into a big, bad joke. The same moral blindness that would permit the seating of Libya and Cuba on its Human Rights Commission was exhibited last week when Kofi Annan’s personal envoy, Lakhdar Brahimi, paid his respects to Syria and Iran’s biggest buddy in Lebanon, Hezbullah’s Sheik Fadlallah. Unwittingly demonstrating a sense of humor, the UN spokesperson described this acknowledged terrorist leader as “a senior Shiite cleric.” And, one supposes Adolph Hitler could be described as “a former corporal in the Kaiser’s army”.
We have had another recent example of standing truth on its head by Vladamir Putin’s recent statements. In defending Russia’s sale of a nuclear reactor to Iran, Putin – who invariably keeps a straight face – declared that Iran could not possibly be developing nuclear weapons, and that it needed the reactor to produce electricity - probably because their oil reserves might run out in 200 years or so. And to further underscore Russia’s commitment to a more peaceful Middle East, Putin is also going ahead with the sale of sophisticated missiles to Syria. Most recently, Russia’s foreign minister, jumping on his boss’ “peace bandwagon”, announced that Moscow was ready to sell weapons to the Palestinian Authority. This only goes to show that you can take the boy out of the KBG, but not the KGB out of the Prime Minister.
Another example of going from the sublime to the ridiculous was Saudi Arabia’s hosting of a Conference on Terrorism, thereby proving that it takes one to know one. After all, the number one financial supporter of terrorism, the major provider of the 9/11 terrorists, and the purveyor of Islamic extremism throughout the world should be most knowledgeable on the subject. Along with the Iranian and Syrian representatives, the delegates emphatically denounced “terrorism” – except, of course, the brand directed at Israel. One critic of the gathering made the comparison to “Nazi Germany having held a conference on anti-Semitism”. The only thing not really funny about this conference was that our own country sent a representative.
But, why not? Now that Saudi Arabia “has launched an effort to market the expertise gained in the Kingdom’s war against al-Qaeda” – perhaps the CIA might want to attend. After all, it’s the same CIA that in 1998 trained the Palestinian snipers who are killing Israelis today. For years now the CIA has been protecting Syria from more punitive US actions against Damascus – despite it harboring numerous terrorist groups and fueling the Iraqi insurgency, citing Syrian intelligence “cooperation” with us. Assad plays this dirty game well as witness his buying more protection by handing over Saddam’s brother. While this obvious ploy should be treated with the contempt it deserves, let’s see how long the CIA will continue this charade.
But it isn’t fair to just pick on the folks at Langley without mentioning the FBI’s super sleuths’ foray into uncovering Israeli “spies” here in Washington. At a time when our nation is facing unprecedented threats from Islamic extremists, surely the FBI could have found a better use of its agents’ time and resources than putting AIPAC, America’s pro-Israel lobby under surveillance and reportedly cooking up a sting operation to discredit legitimate American support for a friendly ally.
At a time when brave Americans are fighting and dying in Iraq and Afghanistan, we must get deadly serious about the war we are waging. But sometimes you can’t help but smile at some of the more preposterous nonsense being foisted on us – both by our enemies, and, unfortunately by those we expect should know better. And that, really, isn’t a laughing matter.
Morrie Amitay is a former Executive Director of AIPAC and founder of the pro-Israel Washington PAC (www.washingtonpac.com).